notes for a lecture to QUT creative non-fiction students

 

These notes are supposed to supplement the wider advice I offered aspiring music critics at Something Awful last December (which itself was considerably expended from the original post). If you think of this as the prequel, you’ll be on the right track.

Everett True’s Advice for Aspiring Critics, the prequel
I approach reviewing like I approach a game of chess: I see patterns on the board, the screen in front of me in terms of blocks – of pieces, of text. I know when it’s going well, when it’s going wrong from the solidity of those blocks of text.

PART ONE: BASIC
Every review should have certain basic elements to a greater or lesser extent, depending on the publication

    * STRUCTURE – have an idea of what you’re writing, why you’re writing it and how you’re going to write it – before you even start typing.
    * CONTEXT – who are these people? why are they here? are there other people like them? what does their music sound like (roughly)? where are we? is there anything strange or unique about that? what’s the wider framework?
    * AUTHORITY - a couple of song titles. a couple of musicians’ names. maybe mention previous albums, previous bands, previous songs, previous visits. maybe mention place of origin, date formed. quote lyrics, if appropriate. quote between-song banter, if appropriate. give an easily-understood reference point, to aid understanding. give an obscure reference point, to establish your credentials. give information, and make sure you get it right. (reviewing a live show? source the set list.) (reviewing a CD or MP3? do your research.)
    * CREATIVITY – don’t let anyone ever browbeat you into thinking music criticism is dull, or reviewing a band is a chore. you think that? get the fuck out of writing about music. first: interest yourself with what you’re writing. if you’re not interested yourself why the hell would anyone else be? DON’T BE DULL. understand that what you’re doing is part of the entertainment industry. facts are way less important than being entertaining … depending, of course, who you’re writing for. avoid describing the music itself. try and give a sense of the music instead. anecdotes are good. similes and metaphors are OK but DON’T MIX THEM. personal perspective is fine but always bring it back to the music itself.
    * OPINION – often not strictly necessary. Most publications will only print positive reviews, however (despite the reputation music critics have for being negative). Don’t say “this is crap”. Do say “Silverchair are an abomination against nature”. BE ENTERTAINING. and never forget the ONE INVIOLATE RULE OF MUSIC CRITICISM.  people are not reading you to find out stuff about you. they are reading you to find out stuff about the music.

Let’s deconstruct a recent review of Belle And Sebastian live, written for Brisbane-based music website Collapse Board – bearing in mind that this website is a) niche and b) prides itself on the personal.

(continues overleaf)